Posts Tagged ‘Relationships’

June 11th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Single Parents

Apparently Rachel inspired me. ;) Yeah, I said it. Sigh… Was sitting on the couch the other night staring at him and he looked over and said lovingly, “What’s up? Why are you looking at me?” Couldn’t help myself (and had some beer courage). Grabbed his neck, put my mouth up to his ear and said, “I am totally falling in love with you and it scares the shit out of me!” Guess what? He loves me, too. Grin.

Remember a few months ago when I said I have no doubts, no red flags, no worries? Yep, gets better every day and still not a single “Holy crap, this man is a psycho!” warning signs. As Ms. Single Mama says, “This is just too weird. Feels like a dream and we’re both in it together.”

And, oh yeah, he actually does things to help me out (not a narcissist – woot!) like spending the afternoon at my house waiting for the cable guy or cooking me dinner after a hard day without me having to ask. And when I talk about my job or my family or other issues, he LISTENS! And gives feedback that makes it clear that he has heard and is actually helpful, not obnoxious and forceful “fixing”.

And, oh yeah, he makes my toes curl. Sexy texts aren’t his thing but he knows I like them. Out of the blue yesterday he sent me a sexy text that just made me swoon. :-) He’s romantic in that the sweet things he does are so unexpected and awesome.

I especially like the way he is with Pumpkinhead. And this, of course, is where I have to be most careful. What I like is the way he will text me out of the blue with a really thoughtful suggestion for something we could all do together and it is always something Pumpkinhead will really love but that we will also enjoy so I can tell he actually wants to do it and isn’t just phoning it in. And even though I kept them apart until about three weeks ago, Pumpkinhead has fallen hard for Mr. V, too. He spent a week at his Dad’s house and would always ask about Mr. V when I called. Then he asked today when we could go over so he could play with Mr. V and his dog. When we arrived, he threw his arms around Mr. V and told him he had missed him (yes, all you worriers, this is where I worry about his long-term well-being but my heart says this guy is wonderful and won’t hurt my child). When we left after dinner, Pumpkinhead leaned forward, grabbed my neck and whispered, “Mommy, you need to marry [Mr. V] because I really like him!” Awww.

To be continued…

June 4th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, MILS, Single Parents, Women in Law

I’m in bed with a frog, a cat and a kid. Wish I was in bed with another animal but he’s at his house securing his gay roommate to be my bitch this weekend as I move/clean/paint (his words, not mine). :lol: Oh well, I’m also in bed with a laptop so I’m no fun anyway. And in the name of non-whoriness, I have instituted a silent “no more sex unless he initiates it” rule… at least until the next time he initiates, and then it’s back to me acting on my tendency to want to jump on him every time I see him. Hahaha.

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It’s no wonder I’m enamored. He may not woo me with flowers like Ana’s awesome new Mystery Man, but his Acts of Service (thank you, love languages) keep me begging for more. Tomorrow sweet man is going to chill at the house while I’m at work and wait for the gas man to come connect service. Eight-to-Five window? Oh, sure, no problem! :evil: Hopefully the electricity will be on by then! And he’s meeting a guy to get quotes for painting and some house repairs so I don’t have to work my fingers to the bone alone this weekend. Enamored? Hell yeah! :mrgreen:

Oh yes, I did mention Ana’s mystery man. I stopped by her workplace this week to drop off some birthday flowers only to find that Mystery Man had dwarfed my masterpiece with a gorgeous (expensive!) arrangement. Not as awesome as the first bunch she posted pics of on her blog but still pretty darn good. (She liked mine better though – said they were more “her” – woo-hoo, successful birthday wooing. :lol: )

Flowers

Found this Bed in a Bag set on eBay. Hope this is as comfy as it is pretty!

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And now, after being up until 1 a.m. on Wednesday packing and loading the car and getting very little sleep last night even though I stayed with Mr. V (and not for good reasons – boo!), I am off to… work. 10:45 p.m. and I still have a shitload of stuff to do before my boss. UGH. On the plus side, my Dad helped me load the truck again so I’m making moving progress. And I do have a cute kid, a frog and a cat in my bed, so what more could I ask for?

June 2nd, 2009  Posted at   Dating

Mr. V and I made it past his “two month curse” mark. :lol: This past weekend was relaxed, sweet, fun and amazing. I adore him. Head over heels.


Lyrics | Michael Buble lyricsEverything lyrics

May 30th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Single Parents

I’m in single mommy relationship heaven. :grin:

Mr. V always says Pumpkinhead comes first and means it (i.e., his actions reflect his words).

Mr. V met Pumpkinhead and wasn’t awkward, weird or strange, which for an almost-40-year-old man without kids or even nieces/nephews is, I think, kind of awesome.

Mr. V isn’t afraid to speak up if Pumpkinhead is acting innapropriately and tell him to cut it out. I like that.

Mr. V is seeking out things we can do together as a group, but is also finding things for he and I to do together alone. I really, really like this because it shows that he is not just trying to woo me as a Mommy but also as a Woman. Some men tend to take an all-or-nothing approach.

Last week Mr. V let Pumpkinhead play his race car game on his iPhone. Pumpkinhead loved it so Mr. V went out and got Mario Kart for his WII so that Pumpkinhead and he will have something to play when he comes over to visit. Awwww. :mrgreen:

Then he sends me a text and says, “Cirque du Soleil is coming to town in July. We should totally get tickets and take [Pumpkinhead]!” Awww.

Finally, and this is what hooked me originally, he wasn’t supposed to meet Pumpkinhead until this weekend because we were taking things slow. He had sent me an e-mail a few weeks ago and mentioned that the movie, “Up” was coming out this weekend and suggested that perhaps that would be a good first meeting activity for them. Quite honestly I had completely forgotten it. Yesterday we were talking and he mentioned the movie in passing. Is it just me or is it totally swoon-worthy that the man remembered and is still excited about taking me and my kid to see a movie this weekend? (Or maybe he’s just a kid himself and wants an excuse to go see it. LOL.)

P.S. Last night I had to drive across town to pick up Pumpkinhead and was then supposed to meet someone on the complete opposite side of town to pick up something I had agreed to buy for Pumpkinhead. And I’m totally coughing up a lung and ready to pass out. When I mentioned the across-town trip to Mr. V, he fussed at me for not asking him to do it and said, “You need to rest!!! If I go do this for you, will you promise me you will go get into bed and rest like you should be?” Seriously?!?!?! I am so used to narcissistic men and to being the caretaker that I have never, never, EVER had someone do that for me without some sort of guilt trip. Yep, I am head over heels for this guy. :cool:

May 27th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Family Stuff, Health, Mommy stuff, Single Parents

Have I mentioned that I am horrible at coming up with blog post titles?

1) My state has a new updated snazzy sex offender registry. Not so sure I’m thrilled to now be armed with the knowledge that there are 72 sex offenders within a three-mile radius of my home. :shock: Fortunately very few who were arrested for pedophilia so I can keep mental images of the smaller bunch more easily. Probably time to have the Stranger Danger talk with Pumpkinhead…

2) I’m so sick. Off work today. Went to doctor and he said it’s not the Swine Flu (couldn’t rule out Pug, though…) and that it is just a nasty upper respiratory infection. That said, he thinks it needs 20 days of antibiotics because it is pretty set in and I can’t stop vomiting. Blah. And he also wants me to stay home and rest. :evil:

PhotobucketMr. V’s pug, Pixel, and cat, Raster

3) Okay, I used to think that everyone was way too hard on their assistants. Then I got one. F&^*&! Asked her to help me today with something our boss needed urgently. She had to pull some files together from ONE folder, zip them and send them too him. Oh no, first they weren’t named the EXACT thing he sent. Then she thought she had to print and scan them. :shock: THEN she called me and I didn’t answer because I was sick and in the bathroom. When I called her back about 3 minutes later, she was frantic and had two attorneys in our group in our office because she didn’t know how to zip files (and neither did they, apparently…). :roll: Okay, while it is nice to be needed, it is NOT nice to be super sick and unable to pass a simple task like this off. Grrr.

4) Speaking of being needed, my boss called me at 4:15 p.m. I had already informed him that I will be off tomorrow but hope to return on Friday. He said that he had an urgent project that needed to be finished by first thing tomorrow. Now it is urgent. And for a variety of reasons, most to do with access to the data and with technical expertise, I am the only one who can do it right now. But geez, I feel like crap on a cracker. And now I have to do cartwheels because this particular deliverable is going to some VIPs tomorrow. Ugh.

5) On the plus side, have I mentioned that I adore Mr. V. Sweet guy drove an hour across town to bring me his SUV. He picked up Crazy Roomie’s car that I have been driving and is taking it back to her to switch out with Big Ass Truck. Yay for men who pitch in with the dirty work. Then he took me out, makeupless and raggedy, to a local Mexican restaurant for a steaming hot bowl of tortilla chicken soup (really does cure all ills) and held my snotty hand even after I coughed. Swoon. :mrgreen: He’s planning a trip to his home state in August and asked me to come with (and, unlike past boyfriends, he actually wants to pay for my ticket!!) And he told Pumpkinhead tonight that he’s picking up Mario Kart for his WII so they will have something to play when we come over. Sweet!!

May 21st, 2009  Posted at   Dating

May 20th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Single Parents

May is Masturbation Month. If you’re not doing it, you must get started because, really, the month is almost over. If you need a little inspiration, check out my sidebar for some erotica blogs to read or go over and look at T’s review of her first
G-Spot Toy
.

I prefer Lelo’s line of hypoallergenic, super-powered and (WOOT!) rechargeable toys. They are worth every single penny and available at my favorite toy store, Babeland.com. I find the Lelo line much less intimidating than those freaky/weird and HARD plastic rabbit toys. Ugh. You can even give your sweetie a treat for masturbation month. For the heterosexuals out there, read about the Top Five Sex Toys for Men at Babeland, complete with user reviews and guides. And for those between partners who’d like a little instruction, Babeland has a full line of instructional DVDs for your viewing pleasure. As for me, I think it may be time to break this little gem out again and try it again for some partnered sex. It was a bit awkward the last time I tried it but the reviews swear it gets better the more you work on it and I’m all for simultaneous orgasms so why not?! :mrgreen:



May 20th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Divorce, Family Stuff, Mommy stuff, Single Parents

Yesterday was rough. New Roomie is very melodramatic. But Mr. V and I have decided it’s he and I against the world and that this is a temporary situation. Pumpkinhead really likes her kids and, quite frankly, I cannot afford both my own apartment and summer daycare for him. :sad: But Pumpkinhead is sad. He drew a picture yesterday of a boy with a downturned smile next to a house and wrote “A house is a house”. He’s also pulling the skin off around his fingers, although that started even before my fight with my mother. I am very worried about him and am going to call his psychiatrist today to see if she can see him.

Speaking of my mother, she packed up all of my dishes from her kitchen and put them outside my door. Then she left town for the week. :shock:

New Roomie called me yesterday to ask how much I intend to pay her to watch Pumpkinhead each night while I’m with Mr. V. Okay, what?!? This has been something she has brought up over and over and I keep telling her I won’t be with Mr. V every night. And that Pumpkinhead’s Dad has him two evenings a week. And that if I’m with Mr. V other nights, Pumpkinhead will most likely be with us. Anyway, New Roomie said she will charge $50 for a night out. :shock: Um, no thanks. I’ll find my own sitter. JESUS!

As for Mr. V, he said that New Roomie blew a lot of stuff out of proportion. After talking to her yesterday about various things, I agree. So he and I will talk amongst ourselves and take EVERYTHING she says with a huge grain of salt. Sigh… And this is only temporary while I check out good schools for Pumpkinhead and find a place for him to land.

Now for the weird part. Pumpkinhead said to me last night, “Did you hear me call [Mr. V] [Blue Eyes]? Don’t you think they look alike?” (Um, tall, dark blue-eyed, so, sure a bit, but not totally, and Mr. V asked me out so it’s not like I went after someone who looked like Blue Eyes). “Will we ever see [Blue Eyes] again? Do you remember where he lives? Do you think he remembers me?” Yeah, I almost lost it there. :sad: I am such a selfish witch of a mother. Damn. This is exactly why dating as a single parent is so fucking hard. Because it is not just your heart that breaks, but your child’s heart. I know Pumpkinhead adored Blue Eyes and he just disappeared from his life one day. As a five year-old, that had to be traumatic. I don’t know of another way it could have gone but, wow, talk about a Parent FAIL. :cry: On the other hand, Blue Eyes has been a single parent for years and dated many, many, MANY women, the majority of whom have met his girls. His girls don’t seem to be the worse for it. So who knows? Crap.

So bottom line is Pumpkinhead is stressed and worrying me. New Roomie is melodramatic and a little on the crazy side. Mr. V rocks (and I adore him). And the next few months are going to be interesting. But if I keep the end goal in sight and start searching for good schools and a secure place for us to live in August, that should help.

May 18th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Single Parents

So this weekend was weird. Really weird. A reminder that this blog is a place for me to get my thoughts out, like a journal, and that those thoughts change as time goes by.

So this Saturday, Mr. V and New Roomie came to see my apartment and the storage space and brought New Roomie’s three boys to meet Pumpkinhead. Which meant Mr. V met Pumpkinhead. Apparently even though I know we discussed the fact that she was bringing the kids to meet Pumpkinhead, I needed to explicitly connect the dots for Mr. V. Either that or he was fine and New Roomie’s explanation of his reaction to things was over the top. Both she and her 12 year-old said that he was “really upset” when he found out he had to meet my kid (and my Dad). Ultimately it went just fine and I think any emotions on Mr. V’s part were due to the fact that he hadn’t shaved and wanted to be prepared in some different way. I don’t think you can really prepare for that but I know he wanted to take Pumpkinhead to a movie later this month and have that be the first meeting. I think he was putting too much pressure on it. It worked out fine. Well, sort of…

New Roomie has very little control over her kids. They race around like little maniacs and her 12 year-old talks back to her like you wouldn’t believe. After an hour’s drive with them, Mr. V was tossing around words like “vasectomy”. :lol: We went to Lowes to pick up items for the house and that is where the problems started. The kids were crazy. New Roomie wasn’t organized with a list like we had discussed and we couldn’t seem to get it together. I think we spent two hours there and got half of what we needed. Argh. Then we dragged everyone out to lunch (so the adults could get a stiff drink!) only to find that we had to wait 20 minutes for a table and then listen to the kids freak out while we waited for food. Again, as I explained to Mr. V later, their behavior was appropriate for their ages (2 and 5) and the fact that it was way past their naptimes, but it was still stressful.

The afternoon involved a lot of rain, car trouble, a soaked couch and ultimately my missing both of the events I had planned to attend because of all of those issues. But it was a good thing because just as I was about to get my groove on with Mr. V (yeah, kids have HORRIBLE timing), I got a call from New Roomie who was hosting a pizza party/sleepover for all the kids at the new house to hear that my kid was vomiting. So not only did Mr. V get to meet my child, he also got to host him for the night on his couch while he vomited every hour on the hour from 11 p.m. until 4 a.m. :shock: Thank God Mr. V had a working washer/dryer. Bleech.

It’s not as bad as it sounds. We woke up the next morning, had coffee and relaxed in front of HGTV while Pumpkinhead played with the Pug or his Nintendo. It was very pleasant and peaceful and Mr. V seemed much more relaxed than when he was with the large group of kids.

Unfortunately Sunday was a day filled with miscommunication and problems between New Roomie and Mr. V. And New Roomie apparently dragged in Old Girlfriend who started talking smack about Mr. V. New Roomie felt like it would be appropriate to share said smack with New Girlfriend because New Roomie was angry with Mr. V about a bunch of issues related to the house (which is Mr. V’s parents’ house that New Roomie is leasing). New Roomie started warning me about Mr. V and things I should watch out for, particularly related to his age and inability to adapt to new things, such as small kids. It was all very uncomfortable and I was stuck in the middle. Ultimately I told New Roomie she needs to talk to Mr. V directly about her issues with the house. And I told Mr. V that Old Girlfriend is talking smack. Then I made the mistake of re-reading his old blog entries and seeing that he called Old Girlfriend a “wow” girl, too. Hmmm… :sad:

Yesterday I was painting my new room and supposed to meet him afterwards for dinner with Pumpkinhead. However, he had my phone (charging it) so I lost track of time. I thought everything was fine. We hadn’t set a time to meet and he came over to meet me so we could go. He was teasing me and seemed fine to me. However, New Roomie said that he said several times how I was “late” and how he was upset that I hadn’t come over to wake him up at 6. I’m not sure what to believe or why he wouldn’t have just had that discussion directly with me instead of talking behind my back and then pretending all was well (not even sure that’s what happened, although both New Roomie and her son said he was really upset with me for being late). That won’t earn him points in my book. Especially when I had been up all night with a sick kid and had spent all day working my ass off to get a room in move-in condition. But then again I know him and he was probably just grumbling. If he was seriously upset, he should have told me. I don’t know…

Yeah, taking things slow, trying to believe that he is as enamored with me as I am with him. Ultimately just trying to be honest and above-board. With him. With myself. With my blog (and blog readers). I adore him. I’m happy. And I’m confused. And, as usual, taking more of the guy role in the relationship — wooing, initiating, teasing, etc. Someone once asked me if I take care of everyone else, who is taking care of me? :???: Still not sure I have that answer… (or that I would even let someone – but I like the idea).

May 16th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Family Stuff, Mommy stuff

Mr. V and Roomie are on their way to my side of town. We’re going to scope out my super-full storage unit to see what Roomie wants in the house and what we can move to the garage and then we’re off to Home Depot to pick up some things for the house. Sunday will be painting day as we try to clean up the walls in preparation for the move.

Tonight I’m off to help a friend celebrate her graduation and then I have book club at Ana’s house. Yay!