| So this self-esteem book has a whole section on planning to achieve your goals, whether they are very short-term goals at work, at home, etc., or longer-term ones in life. What I liked is that it tacked the stumbling blocks to achieving the goals and offered suggestions for overcoming them.
Stumbling Blocks to Achieving Goals:
1) Insufficient Planning: you must break down your large goals into small, discreet steps. Trying to achieve a major life goal all at once is like trying to swallow a whole loaf of bread in one gulp. You must take one bite at a time or you will choke.
2) Insufficient Knowledge: a very common stumbling block that requires overcoming a fear of asking for help.
3) Poor Time Management: if you are already juggling more balls than you can comfortably keep in the air, adding even one new goal may be one ball too many. Either become a better juggler or decide which balls to drop.
4) Unrealistic Goals: This is a form of self-sabotage. When you set unrealistic goals, you guarantee failure and continued low self-esteem.
5) Fear of Failure: While normal for everyone, this can be a huge stumbling block for people with low self-esteem.
6) Fear of Success: This is more rare but it’s actually a fear of delayed failure. You fear becoming successful for fear that ultimately you will fail. “The higher you climb, the farther you fall.”
Deconstruction Exercise
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Overall Goal
1. What information do I need?
2. How much time do I need each day or week?
3. How much money do I need?
4. Whose help do I need?
5. What resources or services do I need?
6. What would be the earliest sign that I was starting to accomplish my goal? (first step)
7. How would I know I was well on my way to accomplishing my goal? (middle steps)
8. How would I know I had fully accomplished my goal? (final step)
~ Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem
There are so many other great tips in this book and the accompanying workbook. I’m trying to get through it all but I found this especially helpful for me in not catastrophizing situations and getting stuck/overwhelmed.
LOL. Anyway, for those of you looking for a Nintendo deal, I wanted to put out the word.
And a happy one at that. But you might be surprised to hear that I didn’t start consuming green beans until I was 18 (except for one bad experience at 15 that my therapist says doesn’t count). It wasn’t for lack of offers, but more because of my weird “good girl” core. I didn’t want to have sex until I was able to take care of any products of said consumption. 
Heck, until I discovered the super deliciousness of green beans, I wasn’t even consuming them alone. Yes, except for the one makeout session under a New Jersey pier with a boy from bible camp and an embarrassing plane makeout on a transcontinental flight with my now-ex-federal-con boyfriend 
, my teen years were rather repressed.
Unfortunately, as is the case with super-hot Green Beans, other girls wanted a taste. And, after I underwent major surgery and was laid up on my back for several months, even though he was very giving ( 
), he ultimately needed more than my battered body could offer and, after dating me for about 9 months, he gave in to a waitress at work. I was crushed. 
Spicy Mexican green beans. 
And, finally, I discovered Guatemalan green beans and decided they were pretty delicious and would suit me just fine. My pocketbook was much heavier with less frequent trips to the toy store (except for 
. Ultimately, however, I found a gourmet green bean that is amazingly delicious. 
I’m preparing them in ways I never have before and thoroughly enjoying myself. Looking back, I was very lucky to have started my green bean journey with a good lover (I was 18/he was 30) because I’ve only had yummy experiences, with only a few varieties that didn’t suit me. My friends talk about spending years in relationships with stale, canned no-name green beans. I have high standards for my green beans and have never had a problem asking for garnish or trying a new preparation and fortunately the guys I have been with aren’t shy either. I think that helps keep the green beans new and interesting. 
