| So this self-esteem book has a whole section on planning to achieve your goals, whether they are very short-term goals at work, at home, etc., or longer-term ones in life. What I liked is that it tacked the stumbling blocks to achieving the goals and offered suggestions for overcoming them.
Stumbling Blocks to Achieving Goals:
1) Insufficient Planning: you must break down your large goals into small, discreet steps. Trying to achieve a major life goal all at once is like trying to swallow a whole loaf of bread in one gulp. You must take one bite at a time or you will choke.
2) Insufficient Knowledge: a very common stumbling block that requires overcoming a fear of asking for help.
3) Poor Time Management: if you are already juggling more balls than you can comfortably keep in the air, adding even one new goal may be one ball too many. Either become a better juggler or decide which balls to drop.
4) Unrealistic Goals: This is a form of self-sabotage. When you set unrealistic goals, you guarantee failure and continued low self-esteem.
5) Fear of Failure: While normal for everyone, this can be a huge stumbling block for people with low self-esteem.
6) Fear of Success: This is more rare but it’s actually a fear of delayed failure. You fear becoming successful for fear that ultimately you will fail. “The higher you climb, the farther you fall.”
Deconstruction Exercise
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Overall Goal
1. What information do I need?
2. How much time do I need each day or week?
3. How much money do I need?
4. Whose help do I need?
5. What resources or services do I need?
6. What would be the earliest sign that I was starting to accomplish my goal? (first step)
7. How would I know I was well on my way to accomplishing my goal? (middle steps)
8. How would I know I had fully accomplished my goal? (final step)
~ Self-Esteem: A Proven Program of Cognitive Techniques for Assessing, Improving, and Maintaining Your Self-Esteem
There are so many other great tips in this book and the accompanying workbook. I’m trying to get through it all but I found this especially helpful for me in not catastrophizing situations and getting stuck/overwhelmed.
