Sometime in the next two-three weeks my life is either going to change immensely with a new job or I’m going to resign myself to staying in my personal hell of a work situation, dedicate myself to succeeding in spite of the crap and work hard on school and baby-growing. The potential new job will mean double the commute (40 miles each way), a new daycare for Baby J and a lot of work but it will also mean a great new challenge, a significant raise (20-25%) and positioning myself well for career growth in a non-legal, JD-preferred area. I am currently doing the exact same work as the JDs in the offices next to me (and some even come to me for advice…nuts!) but am seeing far too many JDs who simply cannot find work. We have had some major overhauls in our senior management so my previous verbal offer of in-house counsel after bar passage is quite likely a pipe dream. And if, like others, we go through layoffs? Well, hell, we have a 20-year former BigLaw attorney and two former GCs who have worked contract for us over the past year and can’t get full-time work. With the potential salary increase of the new job and the opportunity to move into a field that has (and will likely always have) a lot of job openings, I don’t think I can pass it up. Now just hoping they don’t see the belly and pass ME up as all interviewing to-date has taken place via phone or e-mail and the in-person portion will take place this week or next.
But I am starting to think I am freaking delusional for taking on something extra right now. Not that it makes much of a difference – current day job has ratcheted up to 12-hour days where I find myself working nights and weekends while trying to cram in school and kids. Reading Magic Cookie’s post today reminds me of how driven and over-worked I was in my job a few years ago trying to convince myself it was all balancing out. Ha! I moved into my current role with the backing of a senior executive and my former boss both telling me to only work 40-45 hours/week and to be sure I am making time for school, which I have happily done. The flexibility I have had over the past two years has been incredible and I keep pinching myself at the difference. Now it’s back to insanity mode either way. The new job won’t be any different (except for the extra commute) but my back is up against the wall and I don’t seem to have any choice in terms of finding a position that is more hours-friendly – seeking outside opportunities hasn’t worked and is less of an option as the pregnancy progresses. I’ve been pursuing the intercompany promotion so far without telling my current boss. Unfortunately the people who said they would be discrete until we determine if there is a fit are being very much less than. I have had two calls from people telling me that a certain individual has told them I am applying. Then on Friday a former coworker came into my office while I was on a conference call, hugged me and told me she had been asked about me earlier that day by the departmental director who is interviewing me. Then she went to have lunch with my boss. So, yeah, probably time to tell him something and pray I don’t lose the promotion opportunity as well as my current role. Argh.
This final school year is KICKING MY ASS. Instead of a 30-module, 11-month year with pacing every 11 days, we have a 30-module 8-month year with pacing every 7 days. This means reading, assignments, etc., are all kicked into high gear and there is no room for slacking. Pretty much every week involves a couple hundred pages of reading, some video lectures and 1-2 live classes in one of my five subjects. The law school is also trying to help us prep for the bar in a way I haven’t seen before – we have to submit four graded sets of rule statements covering 20 topics for EACH class. We also have to submit four three-hour practice MPTs at various times throughout the year. I know this is ultimately aimed at success on the bar but, damn, it’s just more, more, more! For admin law, I get to go participate in a local agency hearing and do a 5-7-page paper. I’m looking forward to that but need to get my ass over to the USCIS ASAP rather than waiting until the last minute. I also need to take the MPRE prep course already because it’s looming on August 17.
But… it’s Pumpkinhead’s birthday weekend. My baby turned 10 years old yesterday. We had a great party that ate up all of my Saturday between prep, execution and recovery. Followed it up with a sleepover for Pumpkinhead and my nephew who was flown down from DC as a surprise. Tonight is the circus with Pumpkinhead, Baby J, nephew and my parents (driving me nuts as usual!). I brought a shit-ton of work home that is not yet touched and am trying to get through schoolwork this afternoon. My dreams of a nap will likely remain dreams. Sigh…
Please send good vibes for whatever comes my way this week on the job front, for more time in every day to get all the work done and for my boss to stop being such a d-bag. I feel like I am letting everyone down right now, most of all myself.