Archive for July 25th, 2009

July 25th, 2009  Posted at   Family Stuff, Mommy stuff
   |   3 Comments

Last week my cousin passed away after a brave battle with uterine cancer. She was my mother’s cousin and they were very close so, even though I had taken time off for medical procedures and even though my mother and I were having a tiff, I had to go. The service was a beautiful tribute to a wonderful woman. HOWEVER…

I arrived at the funeral home on Monday night. My father walks up and says, “Your mother and I have decided that [Pumpkinhead] is going to stay with us tonight so he can come to the funeral.” WTF?!?!? “We’ve already told [deceased cousin's Mom] and [Pumpkinhead's kindergarten teacher, a friend of my cousin] and they are super excited.” Again, WTF?!?!?! I was pissed.

But I tried to set a bit of a boundary. What I should have done was make them tell the people they had told that Pumpkinhead would NOT be coming. Instead, I told them I would sleep at their house (much closer to funeral home versus almost an hour to my place) and pick up Pumpkinhead from his Dad’s house in the morning. So they lost out on child time. Pumpkinhead didn’t even know my cousin had died so I had to tell him and he had tons of questions and it just generally sucked. Then Pumpkinhead and I left IMMEDIATELY after the service, foregoing the gravesite and the reception. Grrr.

Fortunately sweet Mr. V met us and took Pumpkinhead to daycare so that I didn’t have to take a whole day off of work, yet another thing they did not consider.

July 25th, 2009  Posted at   Family Stuff
   |   1 Comment

My mother has been in rare form lately. A week or so I called her to mention that I was feeling ill and that my son was acting out. Her response? “Well, you got divorced, you moved your child away from his grandparents and you wonder why? You’re just reaping what you sowed.” Damn. And I thought the whore comment was bad.

Parents lent me $3k towards the $6,200 I had to pay to get the house sold. You’d think I took their last dollar. Dad still is out of work, so I get it. But she called every single week, if not twice a week, to ask when the escrow money would come in and whether I’d gotten any of the money Blue Eyes owes me. The answer to both was always no. Finally she had my Dad call me and I almost jumped through the phone to tear him a new one, explaining that they were totally stressing me out, that the money from escrow would take a full month and they had known that from day one and that Blue Eyes would pay me when he could. Grrr.

So the check finally came from escrow. Mother insists she has to drive it out so I can sign it over to her. I have de-friended parents on Facebook and am not speaking to her at this point. But I let her come out. Does she run to the bank and cash it after all that? NOOOOOO. She waits a whole freaking week!!!!! Grrr.

Now she’s trying to friend me again on Facebook. Not bloody likely.

July 25th, 2009  Posted at   Dating, Divorce, Mommy stuff, Single Parents
   |   2 Comments

So I’m frustrated today. Ex-boyfriend has not paid back any of the money he owes me and, with the way my parents talk, you’d think they are going into the poorhouse any day now because they helped me pay the closing costs on my house sale. Waah, waah, waah. Meanwhile I haven’t received child support in a month, had to pay $450 for medical tests, my bank account is overdrawn, I don’t get paid for another week and Stupid Ex-Husband who refuses to pay the only joint credit card he was ordered to pay in our divorce decree is RUINING MY CREDIT! All of my cards just jumped up to the default rate because of the “delinquency.” Fuck.

And yesterday Chapin lost his job. Called me in the morning to whine and to ask if I could help him find something else. I told him there’s a little thing called a public library with free computers. He also asked if he could borrow some money. I told him I don’t have a dime to my name. He said fine and hung up.

Fast forward to today… I try to get Chapin to take Pumpkinhead tonight and he acts all cagey, saying he didn’t sleep last night and asking if he can take him tomorrow instead. I feel bad thinking maybe he was so upset about losing his job that he couldn’t sleep. Still, I press for him to watch Pumpkinhead overnight (too long without sex makes PT-LawMom a Very.Cranky.Woman!) Finally the story comes out. He’s three hours away. At a casino. Where he won $400. Fucker!!! So not only has he not paid me for a month, now he has money and still won’t take his kid? Oh hell no!!! I told him he is getting Pumpkinhead on his doorstep at 5 p.m.

Of course that means that after a day spent sanding down kitchen cabinets for Mr. V’s parents (because I said I would when I moved in but have been sick ever since), I have to drive 1.5 hours round trip to drop the kid off just so that perhaps I can have a nice night with my boyfriend. That would be the same boyfriend who won’t let me start painting our room this afternoon because it would “cut into his nap.” (He has a medical condition and does have to nap but sometimes the timing really freaking sucks!) And the same boyfriend who has been constantly on edge and pissy for the past few weeks because things haven’t been going well with his job. Well my life is hard, too, but you don’t see me walking around with a sourpuss face cranky all the time. Life’s short, damn it!

Finally, I am trying to sell some of my furniture. It’s kind of killing me even though I need the money and don’t really have anywhere to put this stuff. The thing is that I am just feeling shaky right now. I have lost sooooo much in the past year and now it’s like I have to give even more up and trust that everything will work out. I believe it will. I do. But it feels like I’m riding on a wing and a prayer sometimes and that makes the control freak in me want to scream… or cry.


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