So I met up for brunch today with Ana and Wine-Time Girl (who is totally awesome, btw). For a variety of reasons, WTG thought we needed a trip to the local toy store for a few supplies. WTG invited Ana and I to tag along and, hey, I needed to get some stocking stuffers anyway so I said, “Why not?” As we were leaving the store today, we talked about blogging this. I said, “Just make sure you say this little shopping trip was WTG’s idea, not mine. People are going to thinking I have a one-track mind.” Ha! Ana’s response? “PT-LawMom, your reputation precedes you. No one is going to believe that.” ROFL.

Anyway, Ana and I got into great trouble in the toy store. I think all lawyer/law student minds think alike. We were analyzing the pluses/minuses of each item, running cost/benefit analyses, etc. We also just about peed our pants laughing at one point. Ana was looking at all of these (WTG sings their praises. I haven’t tried one, but they look fun!) Anyway, she picked up what looked like a studded jelly sleeve and was pondering out loud how small a guy would need to be to fit into it. I said, “Well, some people are just masochists, I guess.” Then I looked closer at it and said, “Wow, you are right! That is for a really, REALLY small guy.” Then I looked up at the box and, behind the price sticker was the image of a hand and the sleeve on, you guessed it, an index finger. She almost didn’t believe me when I told her, but then we both busted out laughing. I think we were both a bit relieved to think that random, pencil-thin men aren’t out there wearing studded jelly sleeves during their sexual conquests.

We did come across one section where I was like, “Um, no!” and Ana was like, “Oh yeah, baby.” But then we turned a corner and saw these(although, crap, they are MUCH cheaper at Amazon!). And since I apparently lost the embarrassment switch many moons ago, I volunteered to ask the “where the heck do you put these?” question. I knew they had something to do with kegels, but some of us (not me) were wondering if perhaps they are magnetized and you put them in separate places. Apparently not. Ana was wondering if marbles would accomplish the same goal. So, of course, I volunteered to be the guinea pig. Since Blue Eyes was busy with a football game, I took ‘em out for a solo spin and all I can say is “Wowza!” Although I definitely want to try them with him. The lady at the store said you don’t do that but Babeland’s instructional guide says you do. Woot! But I want to get this version with a string because it seems like they’d be easier to remove that way.

Anyway, WTG walked out with these and something fun her sister picked out. I, of course, stocked up. And Ana went back and forth and then took WTG’s recommendation that the inexpensive CVS homedics-type massagers really do the trick. I keep hearing that and yet I have never tried that. My friend also mentioned the shower head which, again, I think is a little odd but to each her own. So that was my fun day today.

For more info on the product I bought, which is apparently excellent for post-childbirth health and maintaining your muscles, see
Babeland’s video here (this girl totally reminds me of me. Right?):

Now to just figure out a way to ask Blue Eyes to come over and play with my balls. Hahahahaha. I told him about my “sleeve” conversation and he busted up, saying that is a conversation you’d never hear two guys having.
Edited to Add Okay, so I asked him and he said sure so I swung by on my way to pick up dinner for the ‘rents and HOLY HELL. I think I was propelled across the room but I cannot quite recall because I’m still dazed and confused. I’m just glad I made it home because the legs are still quivering. Definitely, DEFINITELY, buying into the cheaper is better philosophy. Hmmm.