This week’s roundup is up at A Little Fish in Law School. Thanks for taking it over for me, lady. 
The Weekly MILP (Moms in the Legal Profession) Roundup is the brainchild of Saramel (retired). It is hosted on a rotating basis at the PT-LawMom, A New Duck and A Little Fish in Law School blogs and is usually posted no later than Monday morning. Next week’s MILP Roundup will be somewhere to be determined
I can’t begin to tell you how much everyone’s support has meant the past few days. Thank you all! As recently as last night, I just could not move for all the anxiety. I’m doing a bit better today and I know it has to do with all of the positive energy you all are sending my way. I appreciate it more than you know.
Sugarland – Fall into Me
When the weight of the world
Breaks down so strong it leaves footprints on the street
And there’s too many miles to face without a few more hours sleep
The storm clouds overhead won’t shed any rain to quench your thirst
I wanna be the one you reach for firstWhen your faith is stretched so thin that you can see right through your soul
And you can’t find a nickel to buy a smile ’cause your pockets all got holes
You wanna shut the door and hide before the day can get much worse
I wanna be the one you reach for firstFall into me
My arms are opened wide
And you don’t have to say a word
Cause I already see
That it’s hard
And you’re scared
And you’re tired
And it hurts
And I wanna be the one you reach for firstI wanna be the bottle you’ve been drinking with your eyes
Or the road you run away on, you’ve been runnin all your life
The third row pew that you last knew as a child in church
I wanna be the one you reach for firstFall into me
My arms are opened wide
And you don’t have to say a word
Cause I already see
That it’s hard
And you’re scared
And you’re tired
And it hurts
And I wanna be the one you reach for firstBefore you turn the key
Before you fall asleep
Before you drift away to find some demons waiting for you in your dreams
Before your arms stretched wide open
Before you’re reaching for the sky
Before you’re searching for direction
And all the answers till you fallFall into me
My arms are stretched opened wide
You don’t have to say a word
Cause I already see
That it’s hard
And your scared
And your tired
And it hurts
And I wanna be the one you reach for first
Taking the Buspar first thing this morning really helped. I made it to DivorceCare and recounted my week with only a few tears. The group prayed over me, encouraged me and I left feeling more empowered.
Pumpkinhead and I went to the mall where I picked up the basics – foundation and powder, while making a note of other things I’ll need to get down the road. The Clinique lady gave me a free sampler mascara and lip gloss and my mother had a spare lipstick and Bonus Time blush for me to use. I walked out of the mall feeling a bit brighter.
Came home and threw myself into cleaning my room. Blue Eyes promised to give me his stairclimber if I cleaned up some boxes and made space for it. Done. Bring it, man. 
I could sure use it about now.
My mother is sending me off to the grocery store now and then I’m coming home to work on my anti-corruption paper and some “real” work I brought home this weekend. I’m going to get a good night’s sleep and try to face the week less worked up. I still have no idea when the glass will be replaced in my car or what I will do about all of the other issues I have to handle but tomorrow is another day. I am trying not to think about any of it tonight or I will just get stuck again. One thing at a atime!
When Chapin came over last night to pick up Pumpkinhead and told me he refused to leave the truck, I got sick yet again. And I realized I have to do something. He said that I should just pay it because he doesn’t care about his credit. He plans to go back to Guatemala someday (soon?). Right now he is taking up 1/2 of a $150/month climate-controlled storage unit while I pay $250/month for another for all of our household contents. SCREW THAT! 
Fire sale, anyone? I am going to get through the rest of school and then spend the next few weekends and Christmas going through everything and taking stuff to consignment, putting it on Craigslist, etc., until I get down to the bare minimum that I don’t want to lose (like the china cabinet) and that will hopefully fit in the other 1/2 of my parents’ storage unit. My expenses keep rising with various unexpected things and I need to take control. I am telling Chapin he has a month to get his shit out of the storage unit or it’s going on sale. Grrr.
You say your every day
Is a bad dream that keeps repeatin’
Maybe you should’ve thought about that
When you were cheatin’How do you like that furnished room
The bed, the chair, the table
The TV picture comes and goes
Too bad you don’t have cable
How do you like that paper plate
And those pork ‘n’ beans you’re eatin’
Maybe you should’ve thought about that
When you were cheatin’How do you like that beat-up car
I think it’s fair we traded
Your pick-up truck is running fine
It’s a cozy ride for datin’
Yes, I’ve been out a time or two
And found the comfort I’ve been needin’
Maybe you should’ve thought about that
When you were cheatin’You made your bed and you’re out of mine
You lie awake and I sleep just fine
You’ve done your sowing
Now you can do your reaping
Maybe you should’ve thought about that
When you were cheatin’
I know I need to do the Roundup today. I will get to it sometime this afternoon.
Blue Eyes lost a patient yesterday. That’s only the second time in three months and he was really upset. He cleaned the patient and the room but had to be present while the family came in to view the body and grieve. I cannot even imagine how difficult that must have been.
After I picked Pumpkinhead up from Chapin (who refused to turn over the truck 
), Pumpkinhead and I rented some funny DVDs and went over to watch them with him. Then Pumpkinhead fell asleep watching Star Wars and Blue Eyes got called into work again (he has weekend call all month) so I stayed on the couch watching Chappelle Show until he returned. We decided to stay over since Pumpkinhead was already asleep in Blue Eyes’ daughter’s room.
Pumpkinhead and I got up this morning and headed off to McDonalds to return our RedBox DVDs and pick up some breakfast. Now we’re getting ready to head off to DivorceCare and I’m going to try to make it to the mall today for some makeup. I still can’t seem to face taking concrete steps towards accomplishing anything that needs to get done. The trip to the credit union took all of me yesterday. I think today I will take the anti-anxiety meds BEFORE I leave for the day, as opposed to yesterday when I took it after I arrived home. And sometime today I have to get an outline developed for my anti-corruption class paper. As much as I would like to be done with all of this right now, I am not going to throw this semester down the tubes. Just send me energy vibes and prayers for concentration, okay?
