Archive for September 29th, 2008

September 29th, 2008  Posted at   Blogging
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Dad Gone Mad is asking six great questions on his blog. I’m stealing and sharing them with you. ;) Answer them there, answer them here, but share.

1. There’s something you’ve always dreamed of doing, but you haven’t done it because you think you lack the time, money, or support to do so. What is that something? And what are the REAL roadblocks keeping you from it?

2. Name something you would eat more of if health, cost, allergy, and caloric intake were of no concern.

3. What is the one singer/band, book/author, painting/painter or author artist/work of art that “speaks to you” most? Why?

4. If your country’s government handed you a check for $10 billion and empowered you use that money to support a single program, cause, or organization, where would you send it?

5. What really, genuinely pisses you off?

6. Describe your current level of happiness and contentment in your life. Are you living the life you imagined for yourself when you were younger?

My Answers:
1. There’s something you’ve always dreamed of doing, but you haven’t done it because you think you lack the time, money, or support to do so. What is that something? And what are the REAL roadblocks keeping you from it?

I’m the kind of person who does the things my heart dreams of. The only dream I’ve had that I have not accomplished is owning a used bookstore and spending my days reading in a cozy armchair with a fat cat by my side. The roadblock is money and life. In reality, with kids and a job, there is no way to have a peaceful life like that right now. Perhaps in my retirement years.

2. Name something you would eat more of if health, cost, allergy, and caloric intake were of no concern.
Easy – Chocolate molten cake with raspberries!

3. What is the one singer/band, book/author, painting/painter or author artist/work of art that “speaks to you” most? Why?
This is so hard. Forget one. Alison Kraus’s voice is so peaceful and beautiful. I also love Kelly Willis for her smooth, easy style and Sarah Johns for her wicked wit. Brad Paisley makes me laugh, Travis Tritt touches the romantic parts of me, and Toby Keith/Trace Adkins’ songs turn me on. LOL. In terms of art, I love landscapes with rich colors and sketches of people, from babies to adults. Pencil sketches really capture all the detail in a person’s face. Authors – Max Lucado is an amazing Christian author I read a lot when I was younger and more involved in the church. He made me laugh and cry. I love Julia Alvarez’s stories of immigrant families and Joyce Carol Oates’ dark, truthful fiction. Finally, Anne Lamott is an incredibly raw and beautiful writer.

4. If your country’s government handed you a check for $10 billion and empowered you use that money to support a single program, cause, or organization, where would you send it?
I would send it to MomsRising, a lobbying organization that represents the interests of mothers — from healthcare to parental leave to general working mother issues.

5. What really, genuinely pisses you off?
a) Even though I am a diehard liberal Democrat, I am extraordinarily pissed off that John McCain chose Sarah Palin as his running mate rather than one of the many highly qualified Republican women such as Olympia Snowe, Elizabeth Dole or Kay Bailey Hutchison. Her ignorance and missteps just make women in general look bad. :(

b) Inconsiderate people. From lateness to rude behavior to disregarding my feelings, I really dislike people who are inconsiderate of others.

6. Describe your current level of happiness and contentment in your life. Are you living the life you imagined for yourself when you were younger?
I have a beautiful, smart and precious son. I have a job I love and am in a rigorous evening law school program. I have family close by to keep me company. However, I am recently divorced and face challenges with that. But ultimately I *am* happy. I think that everything happens for a reason and that all of life’s events shape who we are. Sure, I’ve had hard times, but there is always a silver lining.

September 29th, 2008  Posted at   Dating
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A man paid me an unexpected compliment today and I’m still smiling. I already felt good today, wearing one of my favorite tops and a great necklace. I’d already heard from a few female coworkers that I looked nice but there is nothing like an unexpected compliment from a stranger. I was getting coffee at Starbucks and he touched my arm, looked into my eyes and said, “You have the most beautiful smile.”

The men I have dated over the years have either been pretty stingy with compliments or have only given overtly sexual ones with a purpose in mind. I, on the other hand, am a BIG complimenter. I think it’s important to express your feelings and I’ve been known to tell a random guy in an elevator that he smells good or that I think his tie is really handsome. I’m not sure why men don’t think that women notice these things. I read an article that a compliment to a woman is almost as good as sex for a man. I believe it (hence the still smiling many hours later).

Men give compliments in many different ways. Perhaps they don’t realize that women can see right through them. There are the charming compliments that come from a place of true adoration. There are obligatory compliments from a man who thinks he owes you one (tit for tat) and women don’t always handle these quite so well because it’s usually obvious that it is disingenuine. Then there are pseudo-compliments given only for the purpose of seduction. And finally there are honest, genuine, touching compliments that make us feel appreciated and radiant. While some women will lap up any praise thrown at them and believe it, others are immediately wary of any words directed their way. But an attentive woman knows how to see through a man and recognize the special and sincerely intended compliment.

P.S. I must be giving off vibes today because, later in the day, I was walking on campus in front of three young boys (maybe 20?). I go to a large university but we were in an area with no one else close by. Suddenly I hear one of the boys go, “Look at that ass.” The other guy goes, “Hers?” The first guy says, “Yeah, the one with the black pants, []hair and [] shirt.” I glanced to the left and right and, really, there was no one around and I had that hair and that shirt. I think it was a compliment… they didn’t say, “Look at that fat ass.” And since I was already in a good mood from earlier in the day, I smiled and kept walking. :)