Part of growing up and working in the real world is learning who you can trust (probably very few) and what you should disclose (probably very little). Lisa Belkin has a very eye-opening, honest and sad article on this in the New York Times and it’s a good reminder to people as they head out into the work world.

In my case, I find it hard to reconcile the way I was raised — to be honest, forthright and direct — with what seems to me to be lying. It twists my gut and makes me feel dirty to tell a half-truth about why I have to take time off work. And when I am vague and return to work and someone asks me a direct question about where I was, I seem incapable of lying. My friend said, “Just tell them it’s none of your business.” But you see, I wasn’t raised that way. My parents taught me to see the good in people and have an open, welcoming heart. Ever seen those “The Episcopal Church Welcomes You” bumper stickers? My parents, having spent many years working for the church in England, live by that. Can’t tell you how many stray, random people have stayed at my house or come over for dinner over the years and they do it at their jobs as well. But I’m learning, and maybe it’s just in the legal field, that this friendly, bared, open attitude just leaves me vulnerable and exposed rather than engendering favor with anyone. You don’t realize it until things blow up in your face and you have to learn the hard way but there you go. Bottom line, Ms. Belkin’s article is dead on.