Archive for October 13th, 2007

October 13th, 2007  Posted at   Mommy stuff

My mother says I have Stray Puppy Syndrome. Always have. In elementary school I brought home a kid who sucked mustard packets at lunch and admitted to me that his parents were starving him (yes, my parents got him help). Another friend’s stepfather was molesting her and my parents let her live with us until her mother decided to leave him and find them a safe place to go. In middle school, my best friends were the guy in the wheelchair and the weird, quiet girl that lived in a trailer park on the edge of town. In high school all my friends were gay (and the ones who weren’t are now!) and I railroaded them into forming a straight/gay alliance. When I was in my senior year, I hid a homeless guy in my parents’ basement apartment so he’d have shelter. I tend to trust easily and give whatever I can. It’s been hard to learn to say “No.” Naive perhaps, but I like to believe it’s part of my call as a Christian to love others as I want to be loved (although I must say it usually ends up being more giving and less taking). And, yes, it’s hurt me in the past.

Zuska doesn’t think it’s the wisest idea to take blog posts at face value, no matter how heartwrenching the story. I see her point (and, in writing this blog post, I am not trying to make her feel bad or say that I don’t think she has made some really important points in her post). You can get taken for a ride, you may not know the whole story, etc. But I am a firm believer in trusting your gut. A while back, a call went out on a blog I read for donations to help a mother of three children who was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor fly to the Mayo Clinic for a second opinion. I hadn’t read her blog before, but once I did and saw a) how long it had been going on and b) that she was a SAHM to a disabled daughter, my heartstrings were sufficiently tugged and I made a donation. I don’t regret it. My little donation wasn’t much, but Heather went to the Mayo Clinic and I’ve continued to follow her story as she’s undergone surgery and treatment. If someone else was in a similar situation, I’d donate again. I just don’t think people are inherently bad, at least not those on the blogs I read or forums I join.

For all I know, LagLiv is well off and doesn’t need help. But having been through medical crises myself, I know how expensive that can be and I don’t know many people who have that kind of money laying around. So I choose to give and to believe that, should I ever be in a similar situation (God forbid!), people who know me — both IRL and online — would come to my aid and pay it forward. One thing about LagLiv’s situation that has bothered me a little bit is so many strangers coming out of the wordwork. I guess we all are strangers, but I wonder how I would feel if that happened to me. Both Kim and LagLiv are suddenly getting hundreds, if not thousands, of hits daily due to the recent publicity of their blogs. Although support is great, that extra attention would probably make me a bit more cautious.

October 13th, 2007  Posted at   Mommy stuff

I’m not a cook, so thank God my husband was a chef when we met. He can cook amazing dishes. Me, I underspice, overcook and generally make unrecognizable most things I cook. That’s not completely true — I do have some standards I can make, but generally new things don’t turn out well. Baking is most definitely not my forte.

That said, Pumpkinhead and I did have fun trying to make the cookies and Chapin says they taste good (liar!)

October 13th, 2007  Posted at   Uncategorized

Today’s Washington Post has an article profiling the various plaintiffs in a lawsuit against Prince William County, VA for its recent anti-immigrant legislation. One is a longtime Hispanic U.S. citizen who is worried because he doesn’t have to carry his passport with him and could be targeted unfairly. Another is a woman who is in the middle of seeking residency after leaving her U.S. citizen husband on the grounds of domestic abuse who has no current proof of her status pending a decision.

Magic Cookie recently asked me to clarify my position on illegal immigration and, since our conversation was held mostly in the comments, I thought it worth re-posting for those who missed it.

CM wrote:

Maybe you can help me out here. I tend to be very progressive in my politics, and I certainly believe everyone should be treated humanely and respectfully. I agree, of course, that children should not be targeted. But if people are in the country illegally, why shouldn’t they be deported? One argument I often hear is “Our economy depends on these people, who pay taxes and are good people” — well, that’s nice, but that means our policy needs to change. Even if illegal immigrants are a huge boon to the country, and even if we need a major overhaul of our system, our current law says that they have no right to be here. Is the problem that there is no way to treat them with dignity and still enforce the law? Or is it something else?

My response:
Well, CM, I think you said it. The policies need to change — not just our domestic policies on immigration but also foreign policies that contribute to the hardships people are fleeing. In terms of the 12 million immigrants who are here, I say by all means deport those who are engaging in criminal activity. But for the other 95% who are here, working, contributing to our tax system and social security and raising taxes, find a way to offer them a chance to work towards legalization or work here for a few years and then return to their home countries with the money they’ve earned. I don’t think mass deportations and harassment of otherwise good people is the right approach, especially when innocent children are involved. I do think that the U.S. needs to secure its borders because illegal border crossings are extremely dangerous to those attempting it, even more so these days. I also think that they need to implement a more rational, fair visa policy that doesn’t only cater to the wealthy. I cannot get visas for my in-laws to visit us because they are not yet of a certain age and don’t have the bank accounts and other paper “ties to their country” to prove that they will return. The immigration system is broken and the country needs to fix it, but if the only crime undocumented immigrants have committed is seeking a better life illegally when legal methods fail, I don’t agree that they should be booted out en masse.

CM replied:

Thanks for responding. That makes sense — the argument isn’t “don’t deport them because we like them, even though they’re breaking the law,” it’s “don’t deport them because the law is seriously flawed and they should stay while we fix it.” I guess my problem is that I rarely hear it said that way. People seem to have a knee-jerk response to illegal immigration issues, whichever side they’re on, either assuming that everyone absolutely deserves to be here regardless of the law or that they should all be shipped back to their home country. (And both sides, I think, tend to conflate “immigrants” with “illegal immigrants.”) You mentioned that you think it’s fine to deport people involved in criminal activity. Even with that, I have heard a lot of objections — again, maybe this is an issue of being worried about extremism and people being deported for jaywalking.

My response:
Especially for Spanish-speaking people, there’s a sense of racial profiling. Just because you look Spanish and speak Spanish doesn’t necessarily mean you aren’t a U.S. citizen or legal permanent resident. I think it’s fine to run an immigration check on someone arrested for a felony, but I don’t think cops should be doing it at traffic stops or busting into peoples’ homes or workplaces to seek them out. Talk about a waste of our tax dollars! In Prince William Co., VA, the legislature is considering a measure to seek out undocumented immigrants and it will cost $11 million to implement!!!

October 13th, 2007  Posted at   Law School, MILS, Mommy stuff, Women in Law

The weekly roundup is available at Butterflyfish’s site. Obviously I’m not the only MILS who is feeling devastated at what’s happening to LagLiv.

The Weekly Moms In Law School (MILS) Roundup is hosted on a rotating basis by Reasonable Expectations, PT-LawMom and A Little Fish in Law School and is usually posted no later than Monday morning.

Next week’s MILS Roundup will be at Reasonable Expectations.

October 13th, 2007  Posted at   Mommy stuff

Pumpkinhead cheered me up. The veggie/fruit stand was closed (turned out I received a newsletter with bad info — too much rain had hurt the crops and they stopped about a month ago), but we found a new park with a lake, ducks, geese and, YIKES, alligators. We’re thinking of heading back tomorrow with bread for the ducks, a picnic and Chapin (to fight the alligators, says Pumpkinhead). :lol:

We couldn’t find a gingerbread man cutout at WalMart, but we did find some scary shape cookie makers (Frankenstein, ghosts, etc.) and a huge Pumpkin shape so we went with those. Then we got home and I realized that last time I broiled steak, I must have spilled some grease because waves of smoke started rising out of the oven. So now it’s on Self Clean mode (thank God for technology!)

October 13th, 2007  Posted at   Mommy stuff

I’m pretty down this morning, but I know it’s nothing compared to how LL must be feeling. Got up and made Pumpkinhead some breakfast and now I’m sitting here with a cup of tea trying to get motivated to get going.

I brought home a ton of client billing for work. I have a midterm due for one of my classes. Not to mention regular class reading! Chapin had to go out of town unexpectedly today and won’t be home until late tonight. My dining room table is covered with clean laundry that needs to be folded. :roll: Not to mention the dirty laundry overflowing in my laundry room. And we won’t talk about the dirty dishes in the sink.

BUT, I’m going to spend the morning with Pumpkinhead. LL’s reminded me that life’s short and time is precious. So, in a few minutes, I’m going to try to snap out of my funk, get dressed and take Pumpkinhead out to buy his Halloween costume (he wants to be Superman). He got a kid’s cookbook from Chick Fil A this week and wants to bake gingerbread cookies (shortbread, really, but he wants a gingerbread man cutout so we’re going to get that). After our shopping, we’re going to head over to a local farmer’s market and see what kinds of yummy veggies and fruit they have this week. Then we’ll come home, bake the cookies (I am soooo unenthusiastic — baking is not really my thing) and then I’ll get started on my work. Hopefully Chapin won’t get home so late that he can’t get up at a decent time tomorrow because I really do have a ton to do this weekend.