Time management
Okay, so they told me that time in law school would be precious. So far I’m managing fairly well. It helps that I worked full-time during undergraduate and took 16-18 credit hours/semester at night. Then after Pumpkinhead was born, I worked a very busy desk at a law firm and regularly took on part-time legal transcription work from home at night in addition to a position with a community organization. So I can balance. But the question I have for myself is whether I’m really giving anything 100%. Sure I can juggle with the best of them. But can I do my best at any one thing? Hmm…
Pumpkinhead turns four this week. He’s having a party at school on Friday because Mommy just can’t get it together to do anything extra during the weekend. We’re going to have pizza and fruit kebabs/yogurt dip. I bought the fruit on Sunday, but Chapin ate most of it. 
Probably okay since I’d rather have it fresh, BUT when am I going to shop!?!? Then I called the local Pizza Hut and the teenage manager couldn’t guarantee me pizza by 10:25 a.m. (yes, my son’s school eats lunch at 10:30!!! 
). So now I have no fruit and no pizza. Oh, and Chapin knows I don’t keep juice in the house but when he saw that bottle of 100% Apple Berry, he just HAD to open it. 
So basically all I have for the party at this point is Spiderman blow-outs (Pumpkinhead wanted Spiderman hats but the one store I went to didn’t have them so I gave up and went with what they did have. Bad Mommy!) I will pull it all together. I always do. But the teensy part of my brain currently reserved for all things party-related is a starting to sound the alarm…
The other reason I’m thinking about time management is that I sit next to people with no kids. In fact, many in my class are childless, even though most are my age or older. Anyway, I listen to them talk about how they stay up until 2 a.m. studying or spend all day Saturday in the library with their study group and it makes me want to throw myself off a bridge. 
I just CAN’T do that and if that’s what it takes to be successful here, I’d better get comfy with mediocrity fairly quickly. I can spend a few hours on Westlaw at home, but using the library books? Too inefficient! If I can’t multitask serving Pumpkinhead’s lunch while listening to course CDs on my iPod and editing my course outline, my day is wasted! My classmates all seem highly intelligent, but there is no way to really tell how it will play out on exams until we get through a few semesters. I feel like I’m doing a lot, but not like I’m doing enough. Recent studies seem to indicate that multitasking just makes us ineffective because we don’t do any one thing our best. I guess what remains to be seen is whether my multitasking, never-enough-time approach is going to put me at the bottom of the class or whether the preparation/grading relationship really is a bit of a crapshoot, as many bloggers out there seem to advise….
July 18th, 2007 at 11:38 am
I didn’t spend my weekends in the library even without a job or kids — my take on law school was that there are a lot of people (particularly the young ones) who don’t know how to study efficiently and therefore waste a lot of time. Some of my friends are extraordinarily bright and motivated, but received mediocre grades because they couldn’t prioritize.
You will be a much happier student/person for having balance in your life!
July 18th, 2007 at 12:40 pm
You have described what I think is the #1 most difficult thing about going to law school as a parent–trying to find balance. And you can’t always find it.
In my experience, though, our fellow classmates who stay up until 2:00 a.m. studying and spend all day Saturday in the library with their study group are not studying efficiently. Those who stay up until 2:00 don’t seem to even open the books until 10:00 or 11:00 p.m. And at my school time in the library is very often social time. I’ve had several fellow classmates tell me they get more done alone in the undergrad library than in the law library because there is no one there to interrupt them to chat! So when you hear them talking about their study habits, put it in perspective. You do NOT have to study until 2:00 a.m. to be a good law student.
I think that with young children, we are absolutely forced to make every minute of our study time ultra-efficient because we are not going to have an opportunity to make it up later. With no job, no house, no children, and often no spouse, there is always time for our younger classmates to procrastinate and to make up for lost time later.
You are doing an amazing job at two very difficult undertakings…parenting and going to law school. I agree 100% with Shelley–having a life outside of law school forces you to be grounded, balanced, and therefore happier.
And it does get easier as it all becomes routine. Hang in there! You’re doing a great job!
July 18th, 2007 at 8:30 pm
I’m going to add that that multitasking comment is a blanket statement meant for the majority of people… not those who have learned to do it effectively. If it works for you, keep doing it your way!
July 18th, 2007 at 9:46 pm
“Multi-tasking” has become just a definition of what we have always done to balance and do what we believe is being an effective worker and/or parent to really feel and become successful. While I cannot speak for your firm’s ideal commitment, I can say that as a mother of a teenager who has either worked full-time out of home anyfor most of his life and for the past 4 years at home, he has grown up to be a beautiful person. I was one of two mothers at his preschool that worked full time and, needless to say, our guilt was endless. We managed to get the cupcakes there and be there at most of the significant times - and I’m quite sure that both my son and my clients may have been disappointed at times - alas - we’re human.
Your doing a great job if only because you question. Just keep doing the best you can - it’s the best model you can provide for a child.
July 19th, 2007 at 12:47 pm
I haven’t yet tried parenthood and lawschool, but just balancing being married, being in law school and also pursuing a masters degree at the same time I can at least somewhat sympathize with the juggling act. Those who are top of our class have no other responsibilities, no spouse, no kids, most don’t even have a boyfriend/girlfriend, and one doesn’t even own a television! If that’s what it takes to be in the top 10, then I’m okay with mediocrity. I do the best I can, but I have other responsibilities and interests besides memorizing horn books.
But there are plenty of parents in our class who do very well, I think it just depends on how focused you are and how good of a student. Me? I’m just not that dedicated.
July 19th, 2007 at 8:35 pm
>>I listen to them talk about how they stay up until 2 a.m. studying or spend all day Saturday in the library with their study group and it makes me want to throw myself off a bridge. I just CAN’T do that
God you just said it exactly like it is!
July 25th, 2007 at 10:14 pm
Wow! I have just tonight begun venturing into the blog world. Low and behold one of the first sites I go to I really relate to. at the present I am not in law school- I am pursuing my Master’s. My dream is law school but all in all I am a bit skiddish! I work at a University and know many (and work with) on the campus (Deans/Administration included). It just so happens that we have a law school that has a wonderful reputation. I would absolutely love to attend. But, the thought of trying to balance family (I have a 1 1/2 year old), work (I am the International Student and Scholar Coordinator for the University….any and ALL things international are not just referred to me…I do them!) and law school sends shivers down my spine! I did my undergrad at the same institution while working here as well…let me tell you…I stressed! I could not get it in my head that just because I work there does not mean that I have to be perfect there! Still, hearing that there ARE working MOMS out there that are achieving this may give me the ooomph to attempt the theory….regarding time management….isn’t it really a misnomer? I agree that you just don’t feel 100% at anything. As I am a perfectionist it reaks havic with me! Some days I really envy my friends who do not work and can pursue academics and family. Still, not easy by a longshot, but something I would relish. In answer, no there is not such a thing as time management. We try to do our best at all things. One advantage that you have over your younger counterparts is that you are ABLE to do how you have. Many of your counterparts would not be able to do as you have done. I was once told (not long ago) that the skills you learn from working and raising a child are skills that many do not gain from years of simply working! I certainly believe that is true. Call it time management (which I really do not believe in as everything seems to be of the utmost importance at the same time!) or call it multi-tasking but whatever it is you have learned it and it is of value. The younger bunch have yet to begin to learn it.